When we in the Church think about marriage and family life, mostly we think in terms of supporting couples. We look primarily towards marriage and family life as a group in need, and we focus our energies on providing support services for them such as counselling, welfare, financial assistance and so on. This approach has a rich history in the Church and is well developed through a vast social welfare network. It is important work and part of our Christian responsibility. And generally we do this very well.

However this approach is also seriously limited. It is grounded in a mentality that focuses almost exclusively on the needs of families and thus overlooks their giftedness. Rarely are married couples called forth for leadership in Church life specifically because of their coupleness or sacramental charisms. The troubled and dysfunctional situations in families tend to dominate our attention and subsequently, our perspective of marriage is skewed towards the problems and needs of families rather than their gifts.

In 1980, Pope John Paul II convened a synod on “The Role of the Christian Family in the Modern World”. The Apostolic Exhortation ‘Familiaris Consortio’ (FC) was published shortly afterwards. In it, the Pope went to great lengths to emphasize the giftedness of marriage and family life, especially their evangelizing capacity.

“Family, become what you are. … the family has the mission to guard, reveal and communicate love, and this is a living reflection of and a real sharing in God’s love for humanity and the love of Christ for the Church His bride.” FC n 17

“Evangelization, urged on within by irrepressible missionary zeal, is characterized by a universality without boundaries. …The sacrament of marriage takes up and re-proposes the tasks of defending and spreading the faith, a task that … makes Christian married couples and parents witnesses of Christ “to the ends of the earth,” missionaries, in the true and proper sense, of love and life.” FC n 54

In this new decade of a new millennium, it is timely to turn our attention to the role of marriage and family life in the parish and the wider church. Marriage is an under-utilized resource in parish life. Before we can effectively empower married couples to take up leadership in parish life, we need to understand where the power of the Sacrament of Matrimony resides.